The One Step Wonder

This week I was going to write about how I had finally managed to get rid of a hamper sized bag of mismatched socks, but alas, as with many well intentioned Organic Freedoms (NFPs) I'm going to have to push that idea back till next week. I did manage to match a lot of socks, in fact even half the hamper, but we'll get to my hoarding tendencies later. Today we're going to talk about making life easier. Today it's about the hopefully soon to be Pixie patented "One Step Wonder."

What is this wondrous "One Step" you ask? Well I did hint at it last week when I discovered that my Smart Freedom (NTP) husband wasn't in fact hoarding plastic bags, but was what many types would consider being too "lazy" to bend over, open a cabinet and pry (these nifty containers that hold plastic grocery bags are not that well designed) a plastic bag from it's grips without tearing it. Since he made himself the official Kitty Litter disposer once I became pregnant with my first child about 12 years ago — there's some kind of horrible bacteria that can kill your baby in cat poop — I have gotten out of that chore with the simple hint of what I had to go through to actually get those live babies out of me. So he's not actually lazy, since it's a daily chore and I have no shame at calling myself lazy. I'm all for a full staff at all times if possible, but when it's not, the "One Step" is the solution.

The "One Step" is a magical solution that makes all Organic Freedoms, and Smart Freedoms rejoice out loud when we tell them about it, and it also excites the other types as well as long as it doesn't interfere with their aesthetics. All storage regardless of type should be as easy to maintain as possible. That means winnowing any organizational maintenance chores down to as few steps as possible. We realize in most kitchens already equipped with cabinets (opening a cabinet door IS a step, especially for the more organizationally challenged) that this isn't possible, but even two steps is better than three or four or five.

So what are some good examples of "One Step" solutions? Why hooks dear readers, hooks. Isn't it easier to hang a coat, robe, sweater, etc. on a hook than on a coat and hanger behind a door, or even a towel on a towel rack? It will clear up your bedroom chair in two shakes, or at least after a few sweet reminders to your dearly beloveds of "Y'know there's a perfectly good hook right there that you could use instead of our $1,000 antique settee..." Or "Could you get your crap off that unused recumbent exercise bicycle, (which is another issue, I'll save for a different column) since I went to all the trouble to put up hooks everywhere?"

Also, bins. Open bins are great for people who tend to kick off shoes, or those little people who like to leave stuffed animals, dolls, Leggos, and other small hard objects that can murder the feet of those whose shoes have been kicked off. This also includes hampers. Many people have tops on their hampers which might work for you Classics (SJs) and Funs (SPs), but Organics (NFs) and Smarts (NTs) need all the help they can get when keeping organized.

Let me give you an example of where thinking gets in the way of doing more than one step, "Hmm, this nightgown really does need a good washing, but to get it into the hamper means opening the hamper top versus just draping it over my bedroom chair. Well who's going to be hurt by another night? Isn't it better for the environment to do less wash?" I assure you, if there were no top to the hamper, the nightgown would be in it's proper place, i.e. ready for the wash, thinking or no thinking. Hamper with a top on it? Who came up with that superfluous 2nd step?? It's not like an actual trash can. Rationalization aside, all you judgmental Classics and Funs just shut up. I know what you're thinking, but for goodness sakes it's not as if the sleep wear stinks, has stains or is going to be seen in public. Sheesh.

Anyway. I am happy to report that I have solved the problem of last week's plastic bag three step issue. We were for some reason blessed with a wine fridge in our new kitchen. It's half the height of the big one, it's across from the litter box, and it has just the right amount of space above it to stash those stupid plastic grocery bags. Not once this week have I seen even ONE bag above my beloved fridge cluttering up the nicely stacked cork backed fancy placemats. So the One Step Wonder is a Wonder that works. I'll let you know how we're holding up six months from now.

The One Step Wonder